My Part of the Conversation

While praying today, God gave me this verse.  It’s such a poignant description of where He’s been taking me recently:

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything AND the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.  Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of God.  Consider him, who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Hebrews 12:1-3 NIV [emphasis mine]

Wow!  There’s so much in these few verses, much I’ve never noticed before.  First, he reminds us that we are not alone in our faith, that others have gone on before us and are walking right now.  They, and their testimonies, are all around us.  The picture that God gave to me before coming to this verse is one of a runner breaking loose of ropes holding him back, suddenly free and able to use the full strength of his legs.

I’ve seen this verse before, and often put the emphasis on sin.  But, it clearly says to throw off everything AND the sin that trips us up.  We have other burdens- guilt, frustration, fear, anger, resentment, insecurity, doubt, and depression.  We don’t fully run because we’re afraid of what our family, our coworkers, or even our friends at church might say.  We don’t finally stretch our legs because we harbor anger and bitterness against people we may not even know.  We hold tight to those ropes and chains because, in some sick way, we think we deserve them as punishment for getting tangled up in sin in the first place.

But, God says to break free and run with reckless abandon.

The Hebrew writer reminds us of all Jesus did.  He tells us that Jesus did it all with JOY in mind- not dutiful obligation.  And he admonishes us to not take our eyes off Jesus.  I love why he says to do so:

“So you will not grow weary and lose heart.”

We’re not told to focus on Jesus because we will be led into sin.  That’s usually what we teach.  While that’s true indirectly, the main reason we focus on Jesus is because we will get tired, we’ll burn out, we’ll give up, and we’ll lose hope.  That emptiness and despair gives way to sin, but only after the runner has been broken.

I imagine an Olympic runner surrounded by cheering fans, simply stopping, leaning over with his hands on his knees, panting for air.

That was me.  I had taken my eyes off of Jesus.  I was tired.  I was weary.  And I was losing heart.

Today, may you too break free of what’s holding you back and run with reckless abandon, with your eyes firmly focused on your Savior, His example inspiring and convincting you to keep running.  And may you share in His Joy.  Amen

This thing happened to me today.  Words can’t describe it.  I’m not sure if I could even remember enough details to make what happened seem real.  All I can do is accept that I was there, acknowledge what I saw, and move on.

I continue to be amazed at how much God has been showing me recently.  This most recent lesson was the far most dramatic and powerful by far.  It’s simple, too.

“I will provide what you need each day.  Just follow Me and listen.”

That’s the jist of it, anyway.   On Fridays, I’m the only staff member who keeps office hours.  So, anyone who comes to the church building with needs of a minister gets sent to me.  Actually, the running joke is, “Well, all we have is our youth minister here.”  Today, a man and woman stopped by.  The woman wanted to be baptized.   She would later appear to be possessed by an evil spirit.

Now, you can say all you want about what you believe about demon possession.  I’ve heard quite a bit.  I don’t believe it was relegated to the 1st century, but it was out of my realm of experience.  At Harding, I heard some missionaries talk about seeing some amazingly scary things they couldn’t explain.  I also heard some professors say it never happened outside the time of Jesus.  In either case, nobody prepared me for this.

This isn’t about demon-possession.  If you buy me a cup of coffee sometime I’ll recount it to you.  Truth is, I’m still processing it all.
The point of this post is to say God provided me with words, wisdom, patience, and peace in a situation I was in no way prepared for.  No more seasoned minister at the building to help me out.  Nothing from my formal education.  No practical experience to draw from.

Just the peace and the power of the Holy Spirit.

As it turns out, that was all I needed.

Kate and I celebrated our 3rd anniversary together yesterday. I’m amazed at how much has happened in the short time we’ve been married. We moved countries, changed jobs, had a baby, moved into house, bought a car, gotten pregnant again, started a new job- it’s been a long few years. What’s amazing, is I never could have imagined having someone better to share it all with. I love her even more than the day we were married. No matter what crisis or time of restoration I’m going through, she’s right beside me every day. She’s a sweet spirit, a great mother, an incredible cook, and the joy of my life.
Oh, and yesterday- we bought each other the exact same card!

Hudson hopped right up on that pedestal at our Back to School event. He was ready to take me on. He didn’t see that one coming…

In other news, we’re expecting another little one come March!